From Ryan xxxx, Strayer University:

Dear Kevin,

I trust that you have done well on your midterms this week. Hopefully all your hard work pays off with good grades.  We are now entering week six of the quarter which means you are a little over halfway done with another quarter here at Strayer University.  As your student support specialist, I am here to assist you with any problems you may encounter along your educational journey.  Today, I would like to provide you with a few helpful tips, as well as assist you with enrollment for the winter quarter.

[…]

Classes are filling up rapidly, so now is a good time to register.  You have completed your mid terms and the holidays are rapidly approaching.  Registering for classes now would be one less issue you will have to worry about prior to beginning classes in the winter.

From me:

Dear Ryan,

I didn’t take midterms, and I decided not to register for classes this quarter or any time in the near future since I graduated from Strayer with my BS degree this summer — as you and I discussed on July 15-16 this year.  I can forward you our e-mail conversations from then if you like.

This is just a reminder that I really, really am done.  Seriously.